Thursday, January 20, 2011

Resurrecting the Blog, Ending All Political Arguments

Hey, I'm back, and I have a new word for everyone:

Thi'merca1

It is pronounced exactly as spelled and will be used from now on to end any arguments presented that may be construed as anti-freedom, anti-American (anti-'mercan), or to counter any blatantly socialist remarks.

For maximum rhetorical effectiveness, pair with the words "donlikit" and "G'out.2"

EXAMPLE:

Person 1: "You know, I was thinking that maybe everyone in this country should have health care."

Person 2: "WHAT?! That's socialist!!!"

Person 1: "Well, I don't kn-"

Person 2: "Thi'merca!"

Person 1: "Huh?"

Person 2: "Donlikit? G'out!!!"


I apologize for this; I generally don't like to spout political opinions on here, but, as Jon Stewart pointed out, debate tends to skip any pretense any more and move to the lowest common denominator. Randy Marsh knows what I'm talking about.


1 Cleary, this is a contracted form of "This is America." The meaning is self-explanatory. If you don't know what it means, you should probably take in freedom-hating1A-handout-wanting Jose Canseco.

1A While one could argue that defecting from Cuba equates to loving freedom, ruining America's game by outing steroid users surpasses any Castro-related defections. Thi'mercuh. We want our athletes at maximum 'roid levels so they can hit the ball four miles, thank you. And we want our no-hitters thrown by tripping pitchers.



2 Not to be confused with the medical condition "gout." Don't click on that hyperlink2A.

2A Seriously, don't click on that hyperlink. Click on this one. It's much more entertaining.